An AS NEEDED Post!

Sara

Hello, Tribelet! Happy Wednesday. I look forward to this middle-day-of-the-week because of, well YOU! Your comments make me smile –and sometimes guffaw — and get me all teary eyed because you’re REALLY learning and doing and being the Super Mini-Women you were made to be. Yeah, that’s awesome.

Loved your comments on last week’s post. You totally got into being ANONYMOUS — and in one case SHARING THE GIST. Can’t wait to hear how things went for ANA at camp, since she could definitely practice anonymity there. In fact, we want to know EVERYBODY’S results, so let’s have it! What responses did you get to doing encouraging things without anyone knowing it was you?

What we’re doing is what a very wise Christian named Francis of Assisi said in one of my all-time fave quotes. Actually, we don’t know EXACTLY what he said, but the GIST of it is:

“Preach the gospel always. Use words if necessary.”

 st francis of assisi italian san francesco d assisi born giovanni di ...

Good stuff, isn’t it? My plan was to give you some more help with using your Super Power outside the straight-up Christian community, and I will. But I got an email this week from a Mini-Woman who asked a question that I’m pretty sure is on the minds of other people as well. Here’s what she said:

“I have a question, I remember times when I could or still can be mean, unintentionally of course. I just have a short temper like Fiona.(In the Sophie series)  I know it’s wrong, but I still feel really bad for it. I don’t want to feel bad all the time. I know it isn’t normal to be mean, but what I am kinda wondering is if everyone at some point can just be mean.”

We could just give our fellow Tribelet member a “No!” or a “I hear ya!” and let it go at that. But here’s the REST of her email:

“Also I feel like I don’t have a right to be part of the Tribelet, sometimes even a part of tween you and me. I have gotten a lot better, but, I just want to feel like I’m not the only one on the planet who has a short temper sometimes. Sometimes I am sarcastic, but only to the people who I know it’s okay to do it to. Even that though I am trying to work on. Please help quick.”

I think we SHOULD help, don’t you? And quick. So this week, will you comment on these things and encourage not only Hurting Girl, but the rest of the Tribelet too?

     (1) Do you ever have trouble controlling your temper?temper

 

     (2) Do you think that keeps you from really belonging to the Tribelet?

Just so I don’t leave you hanging on this for a whole week, here is part of the answer I gave our Tribelet friend: 

“I’ll tell you one thing I used to do during a short-tempered time in my life. I was in my last year of teaching high school and I was tired and ready to be at home writing full time. Some of the kids were making me crazy (well, crazier than I already was!) Okay, so maybe they deserved it, but it still wasn’t right for me to take my frustrations out on them. I got into this habit: every time I felt my anger engines start to rev up, I would burst into a silly song, like, “I’m climbing up the crazy tree!” Or “My precious angel from heaven, your halo is falling off!” It broke the tension every time.

“I’m not suggesting you do THAT, but is there something you COULD do when you get that feeling like you want to twist someone’s nose off or let them have it in the face with a sarcastic remark? Something you could say to yourself, like, “I have more control than a fire cracker.” Or could you put a big ol’ smile on your face? Or say, “Give me ten seconds. I have to go to the Bahamas right now,” and then imagine yourself there (or Disney World, or Baskin Robbins). It’s almost impossible to just decide not to say mean things. It takes a lot of prayer and journaling and self-control and help from your friends. We’re going to talk about all of that next Wednesday.”

For now, let’s assure Hurting Girl that she is NOT alone.

Blessings,

Nancy Rue, the Eldest of the Elders.

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Power vs. Panic!

DOn't PanicHello, Tribelet! You’re coming up with some great ways to use your Super Powers out in the world — and supporting each other like the Super Mini-Women you are. It is ALWAYS good to know somebody (in this case a whole Tribelet of somebodies) has your back.

It’s when you feel like you’re all alone out there that you tend to, well, as KAYLEE and NIMI said, panic. We SAY we’re going to remind people at school not to bring themselves down because they are fearfully and wonderfully made. We WANT to. And yet when the time comes, the old, “What if they laugh at me? Tell me I’m stupid? Or, the worst, totally ignore me?” elbows your good intentions out of the way.

We can SAY that’ll hurt but we’re going to do it anyway. We WANT to. And yet there are several reasons why it’s SO hard. It’s tough for  US and for good people who don’t share our faith. Because:

     * What you really want and need at this point in your life (and this is NOT a bad thing at ALL) is to belong — to know that somebody besides your family is there  for you. FRIENDSHIPS are HUGE, and if you’re rejected, it feels like the end of life as you know it. People (adults) will tell you it doesn’t matter, but it SO does. How would THEY like to be friendless?

    * Kids can be cruel (ya think?) Where a grown-up would just smile at being laughed at and go on with life, you want to curl up in a ball and roll off into a corner with the dust bunnies, because kids say mean stuff, like: “Are those pepperonis stuck to your face? Oh, wait, those are your zits. Why would I believe somebody who looks like she’s wearing a pizza?” It’s human to want to avoid that kind of treatment

    * If nobody takes you seriously, you start to doubt yourself. “Maybe this IS stupid. What difference does it make if I stand up for people — no one’s listening to me anyway.”

And yet, we have our Super Powers for a reason (as in, they were given to us when we were taking shape inside our moms). If we don’t use them, we just might lose them. So how do we keep from pushing the Panic Button and press the Power Button instead? panic button

I have some ideas I’d like for you to try, Tribelet:

(1)     Be anonymous. Do as much of your Super Power work as you can without anyone knowing who’s doing it. That isn’t being “chicken” or sneaking around. It’s getting the point across in a way that intrigues people. Don’t sign your notes to people, and get another kid to deliver them. Those could include: “You were made to be awesome. Don’t bring yourself down. power button

(2) A lot of of hurtful things have been done using the Bible (something we’ll talk about more in a later post) . Rather than quoting that Psalm and giving chapter and verse, share the gist of it. “You know you were born to be awesome, right? So why put yourself down?”  Here’s the deal: if someone doesn’t believe in the Bible, you saying, “The Bible says …” isn’t going to faze her one bit. power button

(3) There are ways to do it (again, that’s for a later post) but the best is to live it. If your Super Power is comforting people when they’re upset, just do it. You don’t have to say to them, “This is what Jesus would do.” Eventually someone will ask, “How can you be so NICE all the time?” and you can say, “It’s a Jesus thing.” The conversation might build from there  power button

(4) Of course, if like HALLE BELLE your whole world is Christian, it’s hard to find ways to take your Super Power out into the rest of society. It won’t always be that way for you, so you can practice now by using your Power with people who SHOULD be doing what you’re doing, and, um, aren’t. And I’m sure you don’t go to a Christian grocery store or a Jesus-focused library (I mean, right?) You can be upbeat even when the line is ridiculously long or suggest a good book to a kid who looks like reading is worse than eating Brussels sprouts for him.power button

Next week we’re going to talk about how the Bible can help you put that Super Power to work in the world in such a way that other kids don’t scatter when they see you coming. Even if you don’t exactly know that much about the Bible.

If you want to comment on THIS  post, for 5 points tell us which of the three things listed above you actually practice this week.  (BE ANONYMOUS. SHARE THE GIST. LIVE IT) Not — “I’m going to try” — but actually DO it, and share what happens. Even if you feel like it was the worst failure since you got an F on the geography test, tell us. We’ve got your back.

Blessings, Nancy Rue, the Eldest of the Elders

Making a Super Power Difference In the World

amelia now

Hellooooo, Tribelet. You are Super Heroes, all of you. Here’s what you’ve reported about using your Super Powers:

KAYLEE earned 19 points by praying for people and writing them notes. At one point for each use of her Super Power, that means she did NINETEEN things over the week. Yikes. Good on ya, KAYLEE. That brings you up to 76. Are you going to email me or what, so we can Skype or chat?

EVE discovered another Super Power, her knowledge of the Bible. You’ll need to be very careful how you use it, Super Eve, but we’re going to talk about that in a future post. And you DO have 50 points, so email me and we’ll set up a Skype session or phone chat.

HALLE BELLE made a card for her mom and helped her brother with his homework. Two more points for HALLE, bringing her to 72!

NIMI tried to use her Super Power with a friend who didn’t really respond, but that’s okay. It’s the trying that counts, and NIMI still gets a point for that. We’ll talk in a future post about what to do when people don’t seem to want what you have to offer.

And then there’s our ANA, who is still trying to figure out what her Super Power is. Let’s make a difference for HER and, going with what we know about our ANA from her comments here and on Tween You and Me, tell her what WE think her Super Power is.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

I think one of them is that she is incredibly organized. That may not seem that Super or that Powerful, but if cleaning up your room or keeping your school binder from exploding is a challenge for you, you KNOW how a friend with that Power could make a HUGE difference in the way you get along with your mom or find your homework when you need it.

  At this point you’re probably wondering who that girl is pictured at the top of the post. That’s AMELIA who was on the Tween You and Me blog for a long time and graduated recently to In Real Life. She emailed me a story about how she tried to use her Super Power, not just at home — which a lot of our Tribelet is doing (which is great!) Here’s what she told me:

Yesterday, I wasn’t a bystander; I stood up for God’s love when the bullying was going back and forth…. and between three Christian girls who are TEAMMATES AND FRIENDS!. There’s tension between three girls (twins and another girl) and they were putting each other down, and I finally said, “Guys, is that really how you want to treat each other?” The twins responded, “Nina’s always bragging about how she’s so much better than us! And she’s not, she’s a slowpoke!” “Nina” responded likewise and they started putting each other down, calling each other names and insulting the other girls’ speed and ability to run.

I interrupted them, saying again, “Is that how Jesus would want you to talk?” They replied (I kid you not) “He approves of confrontation.” I concluded that I wasn’t getting anywhere with them and started sprinting away from them. They asked where I was going and I yelled back, “Race you to the Gatorade!!”

So, I was able to put your tips on stopping bullying to the test, and it worked for the time being. I saw the bullying, tried to split it up by making them realize how stupid their argument was and hopefully remind them that they can be more God-like than that. When that didn’t work, I reminded them of what Jesus would want, and when that STILL didn’t work, I used the final option: Distraction and prayer!!! Only I didn’t ask if they’d seen anything purple. I gave them a better motivator: GATORADE.

That might not sound like a success story when you first read it, but if you go in a little further you can see that it actually is because:

       (a)  AMELIA used a couple of her Super Powers (can you figure out what they are?) 

       (b)  She stopped the peer abuse at least for the moment

       (c) She isn’t planning on giving up

There are two things above in RED you can comment on, and please do. But this is the REALLY important one.

What is one way you can use your Super Power OUTSIDE of your own family?. Yeah, that’s a little scary, but God never promised us easy, right? He just promises he’ll be there. You don’t have to DO it yet. Just tell us what it is … and what’s the worst that could happen if you try it.

No worries. In next week’s post we’ll talk about how to use that Super Power IN THE WORLD without having a panic attack! And keep earning points by using that Power whenever you can — even in the safety of your house — and commenting so I can keep track.

You AMAZE me!

Blessings, Nancy Rue, the Eldest of the Elders 

Using Your Super Power

Nimi's Super Power

Hey, Tribelet! Take a moment to be quiet, because you are in the presence of SUPER TRIBELET MEMBERS.

Super HALLE BELL, Super EVE, Super KAYLEE and Super NIMI have all identified the Personal God-Given Super Powers that will allow them to make this world a better, more bullying-free place.

That’s NIMI’s Super Power you see in the picture. She has the power not only to BE HERSELF, which all of us have, but the power to make OTHER people feel good about who THEY are.

HALLE BELLE has the power to help people with school work (especially math) and to encourage people through homemade cards; she started with her mom and that has made all the difference.

EVE’s special power is to help people find their personalities (so she and NIMI should work together!) KAYLEE has discovered that her Super Power is to write and express her feelings through writing AND praying for other people when they’re down.

We are talking about some VERY powerful mini-women here. I’m sure there are even more of you who haven’t posted yours yet, and we would LOVE to hear from you (be sure to comment about your Super Power on THIS post so I’ll be sure to see it)

Y’know, my doctor and I were talking about this just yesterday. I was trying to make the best of a really, really heinous foot fungus and when he asked me how I did that, I thought of one of my Super Powers, which is to see the good in things that have any good at all in them.  When I said that I didn’t see the need to whine about little things but to just keep trying to make the world better, he looked at me for a long time and then he said, “Why doesn’t everybody do that? Can you imagine what our world would be like if everyone did that?”

I think people don’t do it because they don’t know how powerful God has made each one of us. But YOU do — and that may be your strongest power of all.

So here’s what we can do as a Tribelet this week, not just to earn more points (which we’ll talk about in a minute) but to make a Super Power difference in our world. Put that Super Power to work as many times as you can between now and next Wednesday, September 16. For every time you use that Power you’ll receive one point, so post as many comments as you want.  Tell us what you did and how it worked out.

It’s okay if you offer your Power and someone turns it down. It’s the willingness to use it that counts, and besides, you just never know how just your saying, “Hey, can I help you with that?” is going to make a difference to somebody.

Speaking of points, HALLE BELLE, EVE, NIMI and KAYLEE each earned five more:

       HB now has 70!!! We Skyped Monday and it was a blast

      EVE is up to 40

      NIMI’s total is now 30

       KAYLEE is at 57

      KAYLEE and MEDOMFO, both of you have a Skype or phone session with me coming to you, so please email me so we can set up a time. All right, Tribelet, let’s get out there and make a difference in our world. You’ve got the POWER!!! power button Blessings, Nancy Rue

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CLAIMING YOUR SUPER POWER!

See this awesome, awesome, and did I mention awesome drawing Elder Melle did for you?
See this awesome, awesome, and did I mention awesome drawing Elder Melle did for you?

Hellooooo, Tribelet! I’m back from my last trip of the summer. I’m home until JANUARY!!! (that’s next YEAR!) so there won’t be any interruptions in the first semester of Your Year of Power.

This won’t be a Year of Power OVER but a Year of Power TO. To what, you ask?

To:

snog1Take back the power to be yourself.

AND, not only that, but to discover your SUPER POWER — that one unique quality you have that gives you the power to do good in this world. These six Tribelet members have started their discovery of their Super Power — and they’ve each earned five (5) more points, so that they now have:

ANA 45 POINTS

EVE 45 POINTS

HALLE BELLE 65 POINTS

KAYLEE 52  POINTS

MEDOMFO 62 POINTS

NIMI 25 POINTS

HALLE and her Tribelet will be Skyping with me next week. KAYLEE and MEDOMFO, both of you need to set up your time for Skype or phone session by emailing me. Yay!

More important than the points is where we’re going from here. If you’re one of those six Tribelet members you’ve already made your list of the things that make you “different.” If you’re not, just click here and post your list as a comment to THIS post so I don’t miss it.

Now — take a look at that awesome list. It’s kind of amazing how many things you all have in common in those lists of how you’re different from everybody else! Kind of makes you realize you aren’t “weird”, doesn’t it? Some pretty amazing girls hang out here. Just sayin’.  From that list, choose the things that could be helpful to somebody else. For example:

        On MELLE’s list she said:

  • I love to read. Growing up, characters in books were some of my best friends. I liked reading much more than playing outside. (still do!)
  • I’ve always been a bit of a nerd.
  • I make up silly songs for my daughters, and my fur babies.melle
  • I love learning. I am always teaching myself new things.
  • Things weren’t always easy for me growing up. I was bullied in Elementary and Jr. High Schools.
  • I am not a girly girl at all, but I still LOVE to play with makeup and change my hair color.
  • I think I come across as a relatively serious person, but I am really a big goofball…who just happens to be a big ole introvert.

I’m seeing 3  things that could be used to help somebody else take back THEIR power.

     (1) Melle loves learning. So if somebody is lonely and funky and nobody can think of anything to talk to her about, Melle can read up on Cagean cooking or underwater basket weaving or Leggo friends or whatever that girl is interested in and pull her into the conversation.

    (2) Melle KNOWS what it was like to be bullied when she was a tween. That means she knows exactly what a girl who’s being abused by her peers needs and she can swoop right in there and give it to her. Um, she’s actually doing that by being such a HUGE part of our Tribelet. As in, without her it wouldn’t be happening. .

    (3)  Melle describes herself as a goofball introvert. She can TOTALLY relate to really quiet people who need a lot of time alone AND  to people who love to get crazy. I’ve actually seen her do both. She is definitely your go-to gal in a LOT of people situations.

Find the this-could-help items on YOUR list and choose ONE that you’re claiming as your Super Power. For 5 MORE points, complete this sentence in your comment: 

I have the unique Super Power to _____________________________________. 

You know what would be REALLY cool? If you would write your Super Power in big letters, decorate it, take a picture of it, and attach it to an email to me so I can post it next Wednesday.

Once we know what everybody’s Power is, I’ll help you figure out how to use those Powers not only for yourselves but for everyone around you. After all, God gave you that power, so you pretty much have to use it!

Blessings,

Nancy Rue, the Eldest of the Elders